truthful tuesday. while i'd love to puke my dirty little secrets all over the internet, i can honestly say that's probably not the best idea i've ever had. you'll have to settle for more of my tamer stuff. today i'm dealing with quotes.
some of the coolest people i know quote things right off the cuff. inspirational, or music lyrics, or entire book paragraphs (i used to quote an entire page from The Babysitter's Club because it was obnoxiously impressive, not because it was outstanding literature.) i admire people that can whip out a quote at exactly the right moment...that exact moment when you want to punch them in the face because the last thing you wanted to hear was something good ol' ben franklin said when his life was a little tough. anyway..
i will fall madly in love with you if you quote movies. i'm not talking about running away with you and having your babies madly in love, i'm just in love with you and your knowledge of them. it shows you're smart, witty, and have impeccably good timing. a well placed quote earns you 50 cool points and 10 gold stars.
mortuary school was (at times) tedious. i was so lucky to be surrounded by moving quoting savants. we even came up with a few movie quoting quizzes (which may or may not be the reason i didn't understand accounting). good friends laugh at your stupid quotes; the best friends finish the quote for you.
there's a few things i've learned over the years from the masters of this gift.
* one can't just pull out any movie ie.don't play the "Gone with the Wind" card when the obvious card was "Casablanca". you'll just look like a fool. then we make fun of you. (and quote some Adam Sandler movie about what a douche you are..... see how that works?)
* seeing above, one needs to know a wide array of movies. if you want a hundred cool points, know the year and director to back up your credibility.
* seeing above (again), there are only a select few movies that can be quoted indefinitely. this is sometimes touchy as preferences vary from individual to individual; genre to genre; situation to situation. a few of my favorites are as follows (in no specific order): Can't Hardly Wait, Sixteen Candles, Star Wars, and Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure.
side note..... along with my music, i've never ever claimed to have fantastic taste in motion pictures.
some movies that can (and should) be used frequently (i'm not italicizing.. you get the point *Jaws
*Animal House...
*National Lampoons European Vacation, or Christmas Vacation. no more.
(no one will have any clue what you're talking about)
*Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. no singing.
*Ferris Bueller's Day Off
*A Christmas Story
*Fight Club
*Wayne's World
*Clerks
*Caddyshack
*Monty Python/ Holy Grail/ Life of Brian.
ANY (yes, ANY) Adam Sandler movie....... but especially Billy Madison.
*there's no need to preface your quote. the best ones come at a time that's usually highly inappropriate.
* if you do choose to take the highly risky, often unobtainable accent that the quote needs... be cautious. the accent makes or breaks it. i can pull off an exact "Elllioooot" from ET. but that's about it. nothing is sadder that some one trying to pull off a Joe Pesci, only to sound like a Jim Bruer version of Pesci.
Also, be sure of the dialect..... nobody can figure out a german/canadian/pirate when it should have been italian.
if there's something that doesn't make sense on my page, it's probably a movie. if i say something to you that makes less sense than usual, it's probably a movie. if you respond in quote, finish my quote, or trump me a quote..... i will probably be in awe of your brilliance.
party on, dudes.
